I broke my own rule and loved it!

For those who don’t know my backstory, I’ve been single (again) for about eight years and I have a nine year old daughter. As a single woman, I made a list of rules that I would follow. The first and most important was that no man would ever come to my house for a “sleep over”. I’ve had no interest in pursuing a serious relationship. Being married to someone for half my life was exhausting and I’ve been more focused on finding myself again than becoming half of another whole. For that reason, I vowed never to parade horny men in to my daughters home, (her comfort zone), when I knew that they wouldn’t be staying.

There is one man in my life. I’ve written about him before. We’ve known each other in some capacity for over ten years and our bond grew exponentially when I returned to the single world. I confess that there was always an attraction between us but it was one that we didn’t act upon until we were both unattached.

When we did, however, there was a spark that we chose to continue to ignite on occasion for the past few years. We live a good distance from each other and though we talk to each other almost daily, we only see each other a handful of times a year. Usually, I take the two plus hour drive to see him for a day or two so that I can keep distance between him and my child. When he comes to my neck of the woods, (I literally live in the woods!) he spends the night in a hotel and I pay him a visit.

He surprised me a few weeks ago when he told me that he’d be passing through town on a trip to visit family and asked if he could come a day early and spend the night at my house. Until now, we had an unspoken agreement about my number one rule. I wasn’t sure what changed. I pondered and considered his request for a long time. Then, I told myself that after eight years, he was the only stable man in my life and that, if anyone, deserved to be welcome in my home, it was him so I said yes.

He arrived in the early evening just after my daughter and I had eaten dinner. I knew he was probably hungry after the drive so I served him my left overs. I paid close attention to my daughters demeanor and was surprised to find that she had no trouble engaging with him. She, too, has known him as her mothers’ friend and she has met him in public settings. I watched as they discussed her art work and her love of skating and I was amazed at how comfortable she was with him.

He and I sat close on the couch and watched a movie while she played and she didn’t seem to have a care in the world about her mother showing affection to this strange man.

After I put her to bed, he asked if he could sleep with me or if I’d prefer for him to stay on the couch. That was when I remembered a very important detail and laughed uncontrollably. He questioned my outburst but I told him to come to bed and he would understand.

We went to my room and he sat on my bed. In that moment, he knew exactly why I was laughing. You see, my bed was more than two decades old and had the loudest springs in the known universe! Just sitting on it made a terrible clamor! How could we possibly make love on it without waking every living thing in the forest, including my daughter? To make matters worse, he’s a very big boy who most surely would put those springs to the test!

He elected to lock my bedroom door and turn on my television. He turned the volume up as high as he could hoping to drown out the sound of my moaning bed and sat back down. The bed welcomed him with an ominous croak!

It had been a long time since we’d been together and we weren’t going to let my tattle tale bed stop us from truly enjoying each others’ company. AND we did enjoy each others’ company.

He left early in the morning while my daughter was still sleeping so she had no idea of our sleeping arrangements the night before or, even, that he’d spent the night at all.

This experience taught me that, perhaps, I shouldn’t have ever held him accountable to my steadfast rule. He wasn’t a one night stand. He was someone that she knew and felt comfortable around. Though we have no intentions of taking this relationship of ours to a more formal level, we do love each other and we are best friends. Why wouldn’t I let my best friend and my child get to know each other better?

He told me that he really enjoyed staying with me and he’d like to do it again, soon. So, I’ve decided to keep my door open to him. He won’t need to make a hotel reservation the next time he’s in town.

Oh! And finally, after all these years, I’ve bought a new bed. It has no springs and I made sure that I bounced on it before making the purchase! If I’m going to wake the forest with moans, I’d rather they come from me than from my furniture!

My New Project

I’m excited to be working on my first fantasy/romance trilogy. Developing my own universe has been a great experience! The first installment, The Unlikely Queen, is under way and set for release this month.

Want a sneak peek? I’ll be posting sample chapters here!

The Unlikely Queen

Two Wars

          The first war was the bloodiest war with body counts unsurpassed by any war before or after. There were only four factions then. They were great and robust filled with the masters of many species. There was the Faction of Land who controlled the scaled and furry beasts, the Faction of Sky who controlled all who had wings, the Faction of Sea who ordered the ocean and the Faction of Stream who stood fast in control of the rivers, lakes and bayous that speckled the land.

          The first war depleted the factions. It took so many, it wiped entire species from the planet. Those who were left tried to rebuild and fortify but they’d lost not only spirit animals and soldiers. They’d lost some of their rulers, too. Who would lead the factions, now? Would the Faction of Sky be ruled by the Crow who carried the dead and horded their baubles? Would it be the Hawk or the Eagle or would the Order of Dove take the throne and work with the other factions to restore peace to the planet? After all, the Doves were the leaders of the sky before the first war. The Great Mother placed them in control due to their penchant for peace.

          Each faction felt that it was there turn to rule. Why would any be unworthy? They’d all sacrificed in the first war! They’d lost so much. Didn’t they deserve to be rewarded with the crown?

          The infighting wasn’t exclusive to the Faction of the Sky. All of the four factions, it seemed, were experiencing the same fate. This lack of compromise led to the second war. It wasn’t a war of faction against faction. It was a war between brothers that lasted until the Great Mother came down and demanded that the factions divide. She placed only a sprinkling of factions of land, sea, sky, and stream on each continent using the factions of sea to keep the borders secure.

 This division gave us the Faction of Crow who kept to the mountain. They needed a place to store their treasures. The Faction of the Dove stayed close to the river banks where the sun gently caressed the lush land ensuring a plentiful harvest. The Faction of Coyote, who were cunning and wise watchers in the woods. The Faction of Frog who traveled from brook to bayou making sure the water was pure, and the Faction of Shark who tirelessly guarded the ocean keeping the other Factions in their place.

“Tell me about my people!” the girl with the snowy dove on her shoulder cried.

“Your people were the most powerful leaders of the Faction of the Sky, Ava. They were born to the Order of the Dove but they ruled the sky so justly that they earned the trust and affection of all things with wings,” Columba told her.

“No more tales for the children tonight, sister. The sun is set and they must rest,” Colm interrupted.

          The children pouted and wined but it was Ava who was especially disappointed that story time was cut short. She loved hearing about her family. She wasn’t interested in hearing how powerful they were. She wanted to hear what they looked like; how they moved and what their voices sounded like when they sang to the morning sky. She wanted information that she could use to paint a picture of them in her mind. She’d never met her mother or any of the people in her line. She was longing to know them in some small way so that she could have an identity of her own.

          Orphaned in the second war Ava was being raised by the new King and Queen of Doves who had no children of their own. King Jonah and her real father had been great friends before and during both wars. He said it was his duty to see that Ava survived. He and Queen Sephora loved Ava as if she was their own child providing her with the life that they were incapable of giving to their own little prince or princess.

          At first, there was concern within the faction. The child didn’t share blood with the King and Queen and therefore, was not royal. What would they do to continue the line after King Jonah’s reign? The King addressed the court and reminded them that though the child was not of his blood, she was the descendant of the greatest King who’d ever reigned. If she were to marry and produce an heir to the throne, this next King would have the bloodline of King Collum and an up bringing provided by King Jonah. Could there be a more worthy King?

          “All little birdies get in to your nests!” Calla told the children. “Your mother is waiting young Ava. Do go to your room.”

          Ava flit and floated across the hall holding her arms out to imitate wings. She skipped to her room and placed her spirit guide on her perch, then she leaped in to her bed.

          “Good night, little dove,” Queen Sephora said, kissing her forehead, “May your dream send you soaring above the clouds on a cool Spring breeze.”

          Ava cuddled her pillow and closed her eyes. She envisioned herself soaring as the Queen suggested. She smiled at first feeling the breeze on her skin but it didn’t take long for the sky to darken around her. She tried to drop to a lower altitude but the air was stiff preventing her descent.

          It was dark as night now impairing her vision as she hovered, frozen in the sky. She screamed and tried to retract her arm as something brushed against it in the darkness. Then, something else caught her by the hair flipping her body over pulling her backwards in the midnight sky.

“Let me go! I’m the Princess of Doves and the King will have your head!” she cried.

There was a crack in the darkness and sunlight shone through. She peered at the sky above her and realized that the darkness wasn’t darkness at all. The sky beneath her hadn’t gone stiff. She was laying a top a murder of crows. The sky was filled to its tipping point with the birds of black feathers and she’d been swallowed up by their sky party.

The crows began to disperse leaving her to find her own wings again. She listening to their calls; caw, caw, caw and then, a booming voice from the sky that said, “You are not the Princess of Doves. You are the Queen of Crows!”

Older Women and Younger Men

Older men with younger women somehow seems natural in our society. Men seeking sexy, young, trophy wives and secretly high fiving each other when they catch one. Socially acceptable? That’s debatable. While it seems to be more of a cultural norm than older women with younger men, there are still all those negative cliches and stereotypes that come with this relationship; dirty old man, gold digger, daddy issues, mid-life crisis affair, the list goes on and on. Biologically, there are some explanations for a mans’ attraction to a younger woman. It’s our biological imperative to multiply and younger women are more likely to be fertile and successfully carry and deliver off-spring. But, let’s face it, most relationships aren’t consciously driven by the biological imperative to breed. They are about attraction and, frankly, no one has the right to dictate who another person should be attracted to, (as long as it’s legal!).F

What about older women and younger men?

Let me get personal for a moment – I’ve been married twice. Once to a man my own age and once to a man more than a decade my senior. I was attracted to different things in each of these relationships. When I married my first husband we were both inexperienced in everything. We learned how to navigate adulthood together as equals. It was stressful and bewildering at times but we loved each other and had a great deal of things in common to keep us grounded. Sadly, my first husband and love of my young life was killed while we were in our twenties.

My second marriage was to a man who was my superior at work. He was older and more experienced and had a nurturing tendency that made me feel safe at a time in my life when I felt all alone. I was a newly widowed mother and needed someone to anchor me before I floated away in a cloud of sorrow, fear, and self-doubt. My older man did this for me but our relationship ended when I found my own legs and became independent. He wasn’t capable of allowing me to grow into my own identity so we split.

By the time my second marriage ended, I was a successful professional at a media company. My identity was defined by my tough but fair, logical approach in my dealings with my contemporaries and subordinates. When my work day ended, I went home to be a mother and a creative. The polar opposite of my hard-ass corporate persona. For a long time, I didn’t date or socialize with anyone outside of my small group of life-long friends.

Then, it happened. I was being pursued by an incredibly attractive man at work. He was new to the company and a favorite piece of eye candy for all the girls and he was young! Fifteen years my junior. He would flirt and I would tell myself that he wasn’t really flirting. I talked myself out of the idea that he might be attracted to me. Maybe he was trying to get in good with the boss. Maybe it was just his charm. Either way, why would he want me when every girl his age was falling all over him?

As time progressed, he pursued harder. I guess he thought that I was oblivious to his advances so he moved from verbal flirtation to accidental touches and, eventually, marched up to me and said, “I’m very attracted to you. Would you like to get a drink with me?” I said yes.

Now, this isn’t a love story and it isn’t even about him. It’s an explanation of the attraction between us. So, first of all, the sex was the best I’ve ever had. He was strong and dominant. He was confident and had amazing staying power and he wasn’t afraid of experimentation. When I wanted to close my eyes and drift in to that place of ecstasy and escape, he could bring me there. When I wanted something hot and fast and wild, he could perform at that level, and when I wanted something tender and more controlled, he let me take the lead. Our love making sessions were all night main events but it wasn’t all about the sex.

I loved that I could nurture him. When he had problems, he could talk to me and I had enough life experience to give him advice. It made me feel good to see him succeed at things that he’d asked me to help him with. I couldn’t do this with either of my husbands.

Trust was a non-issue

We both knew that this relationship was not going to lead to marriage. I spent a lot of years building a life for myself and I didn’t want to share. I wasn’t ready to compromise with anyone when it came to my home, my money, and my lifestyle.

He didn’t want to parent my children and we wasn’t ready to settle down.

With none of that “relationship” pressure we were free to explore a completely open and honest dynamic and in time, our feelings grew from lust to a love based on mutual respect and ten years later, though we’ve never been an official couple, we still love each other and would do anything we could for each other. And, though we don’t see each other as frequently as we once did, the sex is still pretty hot!

Though my story hasn’t ended in a traditional relationship, I do understand how older women and younger men fall for each other.

It’s about being open to the idea that love and attraction are possible in unlikely places and partners. It’s about defying the stereotypes and giving in to your own feelings; knowing that sometimes other people will be cruel or say things without thinking; like calling you a cougar or asking if you and your son go out to dinner often.

When this happened to me, my new lover grabbed me and stuck his tongue in mouth. Then, he smiled at the waitress and said, “Mom and I are really close!” while I laughed my ass off. She gave our table to another waitress.

This is not a relationship dynamic for the insecure. If you aren’t confident in yourself, you will forever be looking for judgmental glances and younger girls who want to take your man.

I suppose it’s really not any different than any other relationship. Love is love, right? And… oh, the sex? The experts were right when they determined that women reach their peak later than men do and if you’re lucky enough to come together during those peaks be prepared for fireworks!

Pizza Boys and Jersey Girls

My first published novel is now available on Amazon for Kindle. Paperback coming soon! I loved developing the characters in this book and I believe that they have a smooth dynamic that will bring them to life in a very positive way! Be Warned: It’s a little steamy inside this cover, but, I believe the sexual content in necessary to really bring the story to life. It is, after all, a tale of lust and wanting. It explores finding love in the wild world of the nineteen-eighties when many of the sexual taboos of the past were replaced by acceptance through the movies we watched, the music we listened to, and the iconic figures that emerged during the decade. I really hope that readers are as engaged in the story as I was when it brought itself to life through my fingertips.

What’s Next?

My second book, “Ageless” is currently in the works and should be out of editing and in production by the end of the month! “Ageless” is the tale of a business woman in a dysfunctional marriage who finds romance and passion in the most unlikely place for her.

Hard headed, independent and strong are words that have been used to describe Tiffany Wilson. She’s been a winner in every aspect of her life but one; her marriage. A tough as nails business woman, she believes that her husband might be resentful of her success. To call their relationship strained would be an understatement.

Her husband, Tony, spent a lot of time away from home and there was no doubt in Tiffany’s mind that he was unfaithful. At this point, she didn’t care. The love, if there was ever love, was gone a long time ago. It was just a matter of time before they parted ways.

Desire and romance were things for cheesy novels to Tiffany. She pushed any notion of finding true love to the box in the far reaches of her mind labeled; Someday Maybe.

That would change for Tiffany when she met Luke. He was new to the office. A younger guy with a cut throat desire to rise in the ranks. Tiffany sized him up quickly and determined that he was a school yard bully who lacked staying power. An older woman with far more life experience, she thought she had him all figured out.

When Luke began showing an interest in Tiffany, she considered it just one more of his tactics to get in with senior leadership. Little did she know, he’d been aching for her from the first time he laid eyes on her.

She wasn’t a cougar. She wasn’t even looking for a lover. It was Luke that was the pursuer and with every orchestrated close encounter he was gaining ground.

***Ageless is a hot and sexy romance set in the corporate world of the eighties. Can an older woman find love in this world of sex, drugs, and excess or is she just a toy for the new kid to play with until he gets bored?

Coming Soon

Pizza Boys and Jersey Girls by Tomi Dean Lynch, CPP Publishing

It was a wet and rainy spring night when Bonnie first saw the man of her dreams. She was just a kid and he was old enough to be her father but when he touched her hand, the pulse of electricity that ran through her was like nothing she could have ever imagined.

Danny was the manager of Pizza Mia, a local hang out for the kids of this North Jersey town. It was the mid 1980’s and the attached video arcade and one dollar slices only added to the allure for most, but Bonnie only needed one thing to keep her coming back. A smile or a wink from the dreamy eyed man behind the counter.

Years would pass before the two would actually meet outside the walls of Pizza Mia. She was, after all, too young to touch when they met but Danny had wanted nothing more than to unleash the untapped passion in this girl who worshiped him.

Some dreams don’t always work out as planned and the two are separated soon after their first night together. Legal issues cause Danny to flee for the safer shores or Florence and Bonnie goes on to find love with Carlo, who is more her age but the journey isn’t over for these star crossed lovers who’s paths will reconnect in a tangled tale of jealousy, longing, intrigue and possibly murder.

The Journey Begins

Thanks for joining me!

Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter. — Izaak Walton

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Hi, I’m Tomi and I’m a girl. Actually, I’m a woman but I feel like a girl when I read a well written, sexy romance novel. Don’t we all. I’ve loved to write since I was a little girl and I’ve always had an active imagination. Settling down with a cup of tea, (or a glass of wine!) under a snuggly blanket fantasizing about the man, (or men, or woman, or women) of my dreams is a fabulous guilty pleasure. Bringing those characters to life on the page is my business and my passion!

Join me on this tantalizing journey and you won’t be disappointed. Together we’ll take a whirlwind ride filled with love, lust, loss and fulfillment.

I’m so excited to have you with me!